I Had It to Do All Over Again
Advice to College Freshmen
Trading Places
"College was the best four years of my life. I'd trade places with you in a heartbeat if I could."
That's what my dad said to me as we got back on the interstate, trying to assuage my fears. He could tell I was nervous - we had just stopped for another of my nerves-induced bathroom breaks. As we drove me and all my junk up to Manhattan, Kansas, for my first semester at Kansas State University, I was having doubts about how good college was going to be. Despite my inclination to trade him places, though, we kept going.
Perhaps you find yourself a little nervous about the prospect of starting college. Here are a few suggestions - some practical, some spiritual - on having a rewarding, and hopefully God-honoring, collegiate experience. Each is a piece of advice, if I had it to do all over again, I would be sure to heed. Yep, it's that good.
Tip 1: When it comes to your studies, find a balance.
I took Spanish 1 during the spring semester of my freshman year. Being absent-minded, I forgot to turn in some homework assignments. During the latter stages of the semester I calculated the grade I would likely get: a C. I freaked out. No, seriously. I called my mom - I needed sympathy. She reminded me that she and dad loved me regardless of the grade I got in my Spanish class, which was exactly what I was hoping to hear.
Clearly, I equated my self-worth with my GPA. Don't make that mistake, friends.
Some of you, however, suffer from the opposite problem: You put forth minimal effort on your assignments. You skip class. You don't care enough about your grades.
When it comes to studying, here's your watchword: balance.
You're at college to get an education. So don't screw things up. Don't skip class. Procrastinate only long enough to get motivated to do your homework. But do keep in mind that you'll learn some of your most important lessons outside the classroom. If you have a tendency to base your self-worth on your GPA, give yourself permission to put down the pencil and let loose every now and again. You'll thank yourself later.
Tip 2: Meet with your professors.
Professors give the benefit of the doubt to students they know. It's a scientifically proven fact. Ok, maybe not. But say it's the end of the semester and, in one of your classes, you're teetering between a B and a C. If you haven't availed yourself to your professor's office hours, she'll have no reason not to give you the C. It's no skin off her back. She doesn't know you. You're more likely to get the higher grade if she knows your face and your name and that the two go together. Meeting with your professor shows her you care about her class, and gives her a reason to care about you.
Professors are not the enemy. Get to know them.
Or, are you having trouble figuring out if horticultural therapy is or is not for you? Talk with your professors who teach those kinds of classes. Ask them what they like about horticulture. If their answers resonate with you, you're probably on the right track. If not, you might consider another major you're interested in, like athletic training or ethnomusicology. Either way, you're one step closer to figuring out what to do with the rest of your life.
Bottom line, professors are not the enemy. Get to know them.
Tip 3: Get involved on campus.
No matter the size of your college or university, you'll find plenty of opportunities for extracurricular involvement.
And like choosing a major, getting involved in some on-campus activities is a great way to figure out what you're truly passionate about. Enjoy writing? Try reporting for the college newspaper (you might even get paid). Passionate about protecting the environment? Join the recycling club.
Me? I sang in the KSU Men's Glee Club, played intramural volleyball and on the club volleyball team, was a member of the Arts and Science College Council and was an active member of the on-campus ministry Campus Crusade for Christ.
My participating in Campus Crusade for Christ set me on a path for life. If you want to meet fellow Christians who are more than likely awesome and get discipled by staff who are paid to invest in college students like you, then plug yourself in to a campus ministry.
Overall, getting involved on campus is a great way to make friends, fend off any lingering feelings of homesickness and generally enhance your college experience.
Tip 4: Find a church and invest yourself there.
If you're familiar with Christian singer Ray Boltz (and you shouldn't be; he was popular back in the late '80s and early '90s) you'll remember his song "Church Hop." Here are some of the lyrics to this song:
Some folks just can'tMake up their mind
Changing churches all the time
They want something hot
They want something new
They just can't find that perfect pew
Boltz's lyrics touch on the fact that, in today's consumerist society, we're tempted to treat finding a church like shopping for a new car. We want it to have all the options, and we want it to say something about who we are. And we move on to a newer model when we get bored of the old one. Add our generation's tendency to pooh-pooh commitment to anything, really, and you're likely to see your fellow college students jumping from one church to the next, attending whichever congregation fits their mood.
Look for a church that welcomes college students and encourages them to get involved.
Finding a church you want to commit yourself to is not easy, I know. But I would encourage you, just like Boltz so eloquently enjoined our parents' generation, to pick a church and stick with it. Look for one that welcomes college students and encourages them to get involved. And seek out a church that's multigenerational. You'll be pleasantly surprised by the wisdom and wit of the people outside the 18-to-22 demographic.
If you remember one thing, let it be this: Though commitment can seem like a burden, being part of the Body of Christ, via a local congregation is worth the effort. After all, Paul tells us that "Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her" (Ephesians 5:25, NIV). Now there's a reason to get involved.
Tip 5: Spread the love.
Look for small but meaningful ways to brighten someone's day.
While you're studying hard and having crazy loads of fun, don't forget that, as a Christ-follower, you have an important mission: to love your neighbor. Spreading the love of Jesus requires intentionality, which is never easy.
Loving your neighbor can seem even more difficult on a secular campus, where many of your classmates and professors reject the idea of absolute truth. But even if they don't like your worldview, they will, Francis Schaeffer says, respond to love:
[I]f we are surrounded by a world which no longer believes in the concept of truth, certainly we cannot expect people to have any interest in whether a man's doctrine is correct or not.
But Jesus did give the mark that will arrest the attention of the world, even the attention of the modern man who says he is just a machine. Because every man is made in the image of God and has, therefore, aspirations for love, there is something that...cannot fail to arrest his attention.
What is it? The love that true Christians show for each other and not just for their own party.
Every person you meet needs love. So be cheerier than necessary with the librarian who tells you that you've acquired some late fees even though you're pretty sure you haven't. Or share your umbrella with that guy from philosophy class who gets under your skin but, nevertheless, doesn't have his own umbrella. Look for small but meaningful ways to brighten someone's day. And when the opportunity arises, tell them why you're doing it.
Success, Guaranteed?
Thankfully, my nerves calmed, the frequency of my bathroom visits lessened and I settled into my dorm room - and, eventually, my new life as a college student. The next four years at Kansas State were, truly, four of the best years of my life. I wouldn't trade them for the world.
College is a place to learn and grow and become who you're going to be for the rest of your life. Follow these suggestions and all that will happen, guaranteed. OK, I can't make that kind of claim. But this is the advice I'd give my own self if I had it to do all over again.
Matthew takes a look back at his college experience and offers some advice to wet-behind-the-ears college freshmen.
